Golden Rule In Married Life
In a married life, tolerance is a necessary code of conduct to keep the family at peace. There may be a lot of couples without adultery, but no couple without conflict.
Both must ..
More than 2 months after the wedding, Huy told me about the latest conflict between his wife and his husband: “I said, it was dirty. I give him a slap. It turned around and on that swing, gave me a slap of fireflies
" Now the couple has two cute and very good children. Their life is quite peaceful. I asked Huy: "So who did whom?". Huy laughs: "The two have to bear each other." It is a compromise. This is the secret to eliminating all family conflicts.
We often treat tolerance as resignation, not as a self-confidence and self-reliant spirit
However, both must make positive concessions. Not the weaker one needs to yield to the strong. This is not the privilege of the strong, nor the affection of the weak.
In married life, quarrel, anger is inevitable
How do you accept your partner's anger? Are you angry or indifferent to the fact that he needs to relieve stress that causes nervousness? During the argument, are you silent or do you retaliate for words, though your heart will shrink before your partner's distorted face? After each fight, how do you behave? The answers to these questions will show the degree of harmony in our married life, as well as our willingness to make up with our partners. But there are many people who just wait and see how the other person behaves, or that the other person takes care of the other person to make concessions first. That is not positive concessions.
Talking about mercy, we often think that women are more or more merciful than men. But the reality of sociological investigation shows that the opposite, men give more concessions.
Of the 100 conflicts, 21 men surrendered, while only 9 were subjected to depression. In arguments, it is usually the man who takes the initiative to be quiet first, takes the initiative to end the previous argument, while the woman usually says the last words.
Do not take advantage of weakness to attack
The following story may be an example of proactive tolerance: “We decided to travel across Vietnam for 2 weeks. Everything has been prepared in detail, from finance to vehicle and journey of each stage. But when the Central Highlands broke out to argue. Just firing a few sentences, my wife was loud: "Go away! I don't want to go with you anymore. ” Outraged, I ordered a taxi to buy a plane ticket to return. But that day there was no more plane tickets, I had to wait until the next night to fly.
Patience, initiative to make peace with each other is the secret to help the married life in harmony and peace
I took the hotel room to rest one day to relieve nervous tension. Lying alone in the hotel, I recalled the argument that took place, which was partly my fault. Looking at my wife's miserable face, my heart tightened. If I leave, then this whole trip will be canceled, because my family said that and never wanted to travel alone. When I went to buy air tickets, I swore to myself never to call my wife in advance. Dress her up, you can go anywhere you want and when you come back, you can. But I feel my wife can't sleep now. That is when affection speaks.
And I dialed my wife's phone: "I remember you could not sleep." "Me too". So I left the flight and ran to find my wife. ”
Those are the ones who take the initiative in making concessions. In these families, petty conflicts are not generalized into nature. They do not grit their teeth and vow never to forgive each other but to take the initiative in making concessions. The level of awareness in the argument is extremely important, otherwise both will cross limits..
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